back to the millhouse

The end is nigh

2009-10-08T10:21:00.001+01:00

Big JC says 'holler!'

zoooooooooom.... zooooooooom....

2009-10-05T23:58:00.001+01:00

More photos from various things here http://www.flickr.com/photos/millhouseward/sets/72157622524402260/

Pics

2009-08-26T13:47:00.002+01:00

Here are some more photos of my apartment and surrounding area, if you're interested.

I realise now my rubbish camera phone was set to lowest picture size. Oh well.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/millhouseward/sets/72157622024264991/

Incidentally, I'll be posting more photos in due course to my Flickr account: http://www.flickr.com/photos/millhouseward/

Sweet

2009-08-24T12:04:00.001+01:00

The view two minutes from my apartment.

Any Portugal in a storm

2009-07-25T17:57:00.003+01:00

Now then.

Long time, no post. Usually, my annual post would say something at this point like 'you haven't missed much', but for once that would not be entirely true.

Firstly, I qualified. No more exams ever. Nada. Zilch. Zip. Last exams were last September, found out I qualified shortly before Christmas and lived off the celebrity and fame for the ensuing 6 months. Fine scenes.

Second, I'm moving... to Lisbon. But then you knew that, didn't you? I'm all sorted from an IT point of view... Laptop with wireless, rediscovered my blog, got a twitter account (http://www.twitter.com/millhouseward), remembered I had a skype account, set up a flickr account. I just need to get that new digital camera I've been promising myself and I'm all set to go.

In other terms, I'm barely ready at all. I have an apartment* sorted, and bank account and such like. But the amount of packing done is shockingly small. As I type, it is Saturday evening. I meant to do a day's packing, but a morning's lie in and an afternoon's procrastination means I have done none. National Lampoon's Vacation has just started on TV and I have had designs on a takeaway pizza for this evening all day, so I can't imagine I'll get much done. Dah well. There is always tomorrow.

(Third, albeit minor, I fucked up with the Reading ticket I bought immediately after last year's festival. Long story, and all that, but ultimately Reading is always ona bank holiday and this year Outlook fucked up by recording the bank holiday as a week earlier than it actually is. So dickhead here went and arranged his entire move-to-Lisbon around this, only to find out when it was too late. Oh well, these things happen. In four weeks I'll be in a pasteleria eating pastais de nata and swigging superbock. I may even have a sardine or two. So what you gonna do?)

* Ah yes, my apartment. In the nice neighbourhood of Alcantara in Lisbon. Two bedrooms, very nice. No photos as of yet but ones will follow when I get there. Surrounded by cafes and bars, ten minutes walk from a river, some touristy things and a mate. Going to be a fine move, I think.

Until the next time...

MM

Another test

2009-07-21T09:01:00.001+01:00

just ignore this

A test photo

2009-06-13T11:53:00.001+01:00

Fin, the wonder dog

he's back

2008-09-04T18:24:00.002+01:00

Yes. Tell a friend. Millhouse is back.

Facebook sucks. Blogs do not. If you are reading this, i hereby assert that you do not suck. a relief, i'm sure.

Nine months have passed. I could have posted in July to reiterate my last post - i failed an exam in april, but fortunately did pass one. I am resitting that in three weeks. Wish me luck.

Precious little else to report. Or at least I say that and no doubt the following stream-of-consciousness will prove otherwise:

- FC United got promoted again. It was very close - finished second by one poitn after being far behind all season. And we won the play-offs. We're now in the Unibond Prem - division 7 if you will

- Manchester United won the champions league and premier league. I watched it in the palace theatre in manchester with plenty of reds (including plenty of FC fans, it transpired). Fine scenes.

- I went to france for 9 days. France was good. I got sunburnt. We drank a restaurant out of 1664 (or 'seize' as those locals call it). Parlez vous.

- I went to reading festival. The toilets were disgusting, but the music was good. I've got my ticket for 2009 already. I liked rage against the machine. they were good. i also liked adam green, vampire weekend and metalli... only joking. Tenacious D were also good.

And that is about it.

After exams, I'm going to buy a boss loopstation. The XL-20 I think. Yes. That will do nicely.

Keep on not sucking.

schmecksams

2007-12-20T23:49:00.000Z

jan, feb, mar are now going to be completely utter fucking shit and no mistake

yello

2007-12-14T21:49:00.000Z

hello audience. both of you.

how's tricks? long time, no self indulgent waffle. i guess you noticed.

well, i see i've not posted properly for over half a year. so why post now? well, it's a rare night in with no booze or work or por... er, television in sight, so instead of having a kip, i'm at here listening to some tunes and updating my online persona.

not really much to add. honestly. let me think:

not really travelled much in last half-year. numerous stag dos mainly. daniels do in budapest. bradburys classy affair in newcastle.

and of course rob's in berlin, where i had the honour of being his best man. berlin rocks. i've been there 85 times now (well, three). it's ace. i'd quite like to live there. one day. maybe. of course, stag do's precede weddings and that meant i had to give a speech at rob's which went well, i think. i still mumble far more than i should. i consider this blog to be a digital version of mumbling for the 21st century.

otherwise, just been stuck in front of a fucking computer for the summer - either because some kind people people me to do so, or because i've been doing sad things like this. and facebook. curse that fetid social networking/data mining exercise. it takes up far too much of my time, it really does.

i did exams. i don't like exams. they are rubbish, but i did do some. i am awaiting some results next thurs. for the first time ever, this is the first ever possible chance that i could possibly just maybe qualify and thus get rid of the need to do exams for ever. i hate them with every fibre of my being, every sinew of my writing hand and every synapse of my brain. but i am nearly there. six years in, so not unaverage, just frustrating. we shall see.

2007's been weird, hardly been to any gigs. i really can't remember what the last one i went to was. had a minor flurry in may if memory serves, where i saw willy mason, ben kweller, pipettes, er, that's all i can remember. i'm sure someone will read this now and think "you were at ... with me, you uncaring 'friend', screw you".

ah, that would be smaje now i think about it - went to see maximo park in april, supported by art brut, who i liked.

as well as not going to many gigs (though i do have a ticket for reading 2008 already!!), i'm just out of touch with the "kids" anyway. hardly bought anything that was released in 2007. shocking. all the artists i enthuse about now are either cryogenically frozen (leonard cohen), dead (RIP FZ), or taking time out between tours to be racist (morrissey, alledgedly - only kidding moz, i know you didn't mean it really). finally completed the full complement of moz and Leonard cohen studio albums this year. only about forty more zappa records to go.

otherwise this year, finally started my much hoped for Half Man Half Biscuit collection. THey are ace. GOt the new saturday looks good to me albums and eps, i hope they tour the UK, i love them. I really do, it is almost love, i swear. the rentals have also reformed and touring the US, hope to see them here next year. please sir.

speaking of music, played my first ever 'gig' last weekend. luntstock. see luntstock.blogspot.com for more details, but basically: it was lunts 30th birthday, held in a hotel in his hometownship of flint/bagillt (north wales, wassup), me him mcevoy and lunt's talented drumming bro wowed the loyal fans (all thirty of them, liggers to the core i swear) in the latest incarnation of FWA (for the polite, Financiers with Attitude is the Backronym - what a word - for the rude, check out the series of Peep Show where Johnson makes his first appearance. SAfe to say, this band will steer clear of tangerines). it was ace. that blog will have videos and such like. you have been warned.

and on that bombshell. i'm off. tara

chortle

2007-09-09T12:03:00.001+01:00

Fine scenes

2007-07-07T23:44:00.001+01:00

Test

2007-06-16T15:10:00.001+01:00

Fine scenes.a new phone which has the supposed capability to post photos direct to my blog.. .has it worked?

"done a lunt"

2007-06-13T20:46:00.000+01:00

disaster for millhouse...

walked to tesco from the tram stop earlier in the pissiest of pissing down rain. my phone was in my pocket. when i got there, it stopped working and hasn't started since.

my phone is covered by insurance though, but apparently i'm too late tonight to speak to the insurance people so i'll have to ring tomorrow.

either way this could work out quite nicely... i may end up with a replacement phone, whilst my contract also ends next month so i could be entitled to an upgrade.

so if anyone is trying to send me a message and i'm not replying (because i am that popular after all), that is why.

banter

mm

post number 50

2007-06-04T19:44:00.000+01:00

and i can't be bothered doing a proper one, so have this boring joke. a proper post to follow sometime soon this summer

Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson and bragged that, despite being 72 years of age, he could still have sex 3 times a night.

Cilla Black, who was also a guest, looked intrigued.

After the show, Cilla said, "Sean, if I'm not bein' too forward, I'd luv to 'ave sex with yer, let's go back to my 'ouse, we could 'ave a lorra fun."

so they went back to her place. After a couple of drinks they went off to bed and had an hour of mad passionate sex together.

Afterwards, Sean says, "If you think that was good, let me shleep for half an hour, and we can have better shex. But while I'm shleeping, hold my bawls in your left hand and ma wullie in your right hand".

Cilla looks a bit perplexed, but says "Okay".

he sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even better sex than before.

Then Sean says, "Cilla, that was wonderful. But if You let me shleep for an hour, we can have the besht shex yet. You'll haveto...... >>>"I know Sean. Yer want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. No problem hun".

Cilla complies with the routine. Again, the results are absolutely mind blowing.

Once it's all over, they have a drink. Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla asks "Sean, tell me, this 'oldin yer balls in one hand and yer Willie in the other does it really stimulate yer that much?"

Sean replies, "No, not at all Cilla but the last time I shlept with a scouser, she stole ma wallet!

wknd

2007-05-13T19:20:00.000+01:00

i did do some housetidying this weekend. you wouldn't think so. most of it consisted of shredding things with my paper shredder. that was good and i did do a maniacal laugh like this "ha ha ha bwhahahah" when shredding stuff. i also did some hoovering, but only in the middle of the room by the looks of things. my new hoover is good. i had to empty it 15 times. that shows how much of a lazy get i usually am.

i watched united pick up the premiership trophy against west ham on tv. the match was poor but the presentation was good, albeit a bit showbiz. touching to see giggs and neville lift it together, two true united legends in an age where legend is often overused. i was ruminating that i'd not seen united play for two years when that twit tyler chimes in "and there they are in front of a barclays banner - and given the new owners at united, you could call it a star spangled banner" and it brought me back down to earth. i'm still a united fan, but not a glazer fan. fuck off glazer. we won this despite of you, not because of you.

and on the other half of the broad MUFCUM church, clips have finally surfaced of our cup win last thursday. i watched it twice on the wonderful channel M this weekend. For those interested, the highlights and such like can be seen at www.fcum.tv, or i'll just put the goals here for you. scroll into to about 3.10 mins for a wonder goal by Josh Howard. Granted, its not against the world class defenders the likes of Maradona, Messi and Giggs have had to face in their time, but they weren't playing on sandpits at the time either:

deliberately sabotaged my embedding 'cos it kept loading automatically...

in other news, i recorded this. just me and my guitar and a medley of fingerpicked renditions of FCUM songs - the originating songs being:

- This Land is Your Land - orig. Woody Guthrie, also covered by Billy Bragg
- Sloop John B - Beach Boys
- Dirty Old Town - Pogues
- This is How It Feels - Inspiral Carpets
- Under The Boardwalk - The Drifters
- and more this land is your land.

half arsed

2007-05-07T13:58:00.000+01:00

i was going to do a proper post, but then I realised I can't be bothered.

here are the photo's that would have constitued the bulk of the post:

photorama

In lieu of a full running commentary, here are some relevant asides:

- that's a stylised version of the manchester coat of arms on the outside of the central library; note its resemblence to the crest of FC United

- I did some more pre-exam scribbles

- After 40 days off the beer, I am back on it, for about 21 days and counting. I think I've more than made up for the 40 days of beer I didn't imbibe in that time.

- FC United won the league. And the cup. There are some photos of that here.

- MUFC also won the league. Possibly the cup. Thanks to malc, I wasn't in a position to take any photos.

- Daniel's stag do. Not all the photos survived to this stage. Thank God.

- 'IT'S DRINKING THE WATER! IT'S GOING BACK FOR MORE'

- Another smiths night. Another kebab

- 'Bongo'. That's banter

- FWA. The band I was originally looking at forming with Lunt was called the TFC. I won't tell you what it stood for. It was rude. We disbanded - musical differences, the usual. Then after bonding over an episode of peepshow, we reformed, stronger, better and more motivated as THE FWA. Some may tell you that this stands for "Fatal Wanking Accident". We claim it stands for "Financiers with Attitude". See the logos. You decide. By the way, the position of lead female vocalist is about to be filled, thanks for all those who auditioned but we have a winner and we will be gigging the usual venues - Buckley Tivoli, SHeffield Leadmill, Coventry Colloseum, Norwich UEA, Royal Albert Hall, Whiskey A-Go-Go and The Legh Arms - any time soon

And here's a random link with a funny headline

http://gb.setanta.com/portal/article/football::england?open&articleid=bc6118148d9340eb802572d40038234c

drawing on my experience

2007-04-07T23:35:00.000+01:00

i am currently in the middle of doing exams. i hate exams. they are stupid. they are a pain in the arse. i've been doing my exams for nearly six years. you get less than that for manslaughter.

study bores me. when i get bored, i doodle. here are some of my doodles and similar things, often involving a whiteboard.

that one says "exams are teh suxxor LOL!!11!!OMFG!!". That is nerd speak. I was trying to be ironic. Translated into English, it roughly means "Exams really suck. Ha ha! It is true"

and how did that get on there?

me, in happier times.

it does. everything really does.

ah, "banter". the old failsafe.

note to self: if fountain pen stops working, just give it a shake. don't put the tip in your mouth. you just end up with bluetooth, and i'm not talking about phones.

me. in happier times.

i wholeheartedly echo the views expressed in this scribble.

sorry you got another practice question wrong.

drawn from memory. not bad, eh?

AGAIN.

in Pete's honour.

quite.

what a friend we have in jesus

2007-04-02T19:56:00.000+01:00

he's our saviour from afar
what a friend we have in jesus
and his name is cantona
ooh ah, cantona
ooh ah, cantona
ooh ah, ooh ah, ooh ah, cantona
ooh ah, cantona

we'll drink a drink a drink to eric the king the king the king
he's the leader of our football team
he's the greatest centre forward
that the worlddddddddd has ever seen

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee'll....

amen to that. best player ever.

perturbed

2007-03-24T18:56:00.000Z

Saw an advert for this on ITV before:

Whiskas Cat Milk

It turns out that this is merely milk that's been tampered with to be especially good for cats, and not like I thought cat's milk. (It would make sense, I suppose; kittens don't tend to suckle on bloody cows when they're hungry, but their mothers feline mammalian protruberances instead.) However, for a while I did have an image in my head of a pretty unsavoury cat diary, a barn filled with cats all hooked up to big sucking machines.

It was the thought that they may make butter, cheese and yoghurt from this stuff that scared me more though, but alas it is ok.

This does remind me of this red dwarf quote though:

Holly: Nothing wrong with dog's milk: full of goodness; full of vitamins; full of marrow-bone jelly! Lasts longer than any other type of milk, dog's milk.
Lister: Why's that?
Holly: No bugger will drink it!

Very nice.

And I think I'm going to introduce a lunt style 'guess the song from a snippet of lyrics' corner item to this blog, but was struggling to find something appropriate.

First, I thought of 'guess the album title given a single letter', but I thought this may be difficult. For example:

'C'

Did you get it? Be honest... it was Are You Experienced by the Jimi Hendrix Experience.

Then I thought of 'guess the song by the opening chord'. For example,

'F#7#9' (clue: it's from the above album, and here's another clue)

didn't get it? it was foxy lady by Jimi Hendrix Experience, though I would have accepted foxy lady by Garth from Wayne's World'.

These all seemed a trifle hard, so instead, I'm going to do the 'guess the album from the snippet of it's cover artwork'. Go on ladies, have a guess, i dare you:

awooga - trapped in the drive-thru

2007-03-21T18:31:00.000Z

two things:

1. I liked OG's recent post about that R.Kelly thing, because it was mediocre (the R Kelly thing, not the post, it was a good post, but the video(s) is (are) mediocre).

I also like Weird Al Yankovic. In true Weird Al style, he's now made an animated parody of Trapped In The Closet, called Trapped In The Drive-Thru.

This is even funnier if you've seen the original, i recommend tracking that down. Until then, here's is the parody itself:

http://www.stereogum.com/archives/004876.html

(and we go the drive through
and we're going to the drive through
and we're almost at the drive through
did i mention the drive through?)

2. this one is a trifle more bizarre: sex< stories of kriss akabusi

This may be NSFW.

OK, I'm not some ex-athlete fetishist or anything, just to allay any fears you may have. Its a thread from a football365 forum where someone is making up the most ridiculous spoof Kris Akabusi sex stories. Worth a read, if only for the ever-present punch line: "he whispered 'awooga' in her ear...."

trapiquette

2007-03-17T18:47:00.000Z

as everybody should know, there is a certain etiquette (or 'trap-iquette') that should be followed when using the lavatories (or 'traps') in the workplace, or any pseudo-public place for that matter. trapiquette isn't something that is taught, it is something you just instinctively know. it is something you accumulate over your life, merely by observation and making logical deductions based upon how other trap user (or indeed, lat - lat being short for latrine - user) would interpret your actions. please note - that trapiquette is a catch-all term and inherently includeds latrine etiquette, or lat-iquette.

i know many frequenters of this blog are aware of trapiquette, it being a heated topic of discussion at work when there have been some serious breaches of this not-so-secret-yet-unwritten code.

anyway, i don't propose to start a fully fledged trap-iquette debate. like i say, this isn't taught and it should be instinctively known, with all the main points being aired many times in the past. feel free to debate the finer points of this social code in the comments if you wish.

i just thought i had to give some background before linking to this. Not that I have any experience of an incident such as this, just thought it may be sobering to think that next time you encounter a trapiquette violation, it could be worse. If I encountered this sort of activity in my workplace, I'd be back the next day with petrol and matches. Unfortunately, this would not be impossible to envisage given the way some of the fellow office tennants go about their business, so to speak.

best online football type games

2007-03-11T00:08:00.000Z

this is probably rehashing things you've probably all seen before, maybe ages ago, but i thought it was worth doing: what are the best online football type games?

In my opinion, and not necessarily in any particular order, they are:

Roberto Baggio's Magical Kicks

A superb free-kick game, endorsed by the rat-tailed ex-Italian striker of the same name. This is, in my opinion, the best free-kick game there is. Kicks from all over the final 3rd, varying weather conditions, wall-sizes, so on. Will you bend it around the left or right? Curve it around the wall or just go over it? If there is another player on the screen, you can even try to pass it to them and watch them slam it in (or try to) - or, they may get fouled and you get a penalty, where you can try and replicate Baggio's own penalty miss from USA 94 that handed the World Cup to Brazil. A quality game. Only downside is that it was officially taken off the intertubes some time ago and only a few mirrors of it exist - and these don't have access to the myriad of inspirational sayings that would appear after each miss/goal ("that was good kick! you do good on field today") and such like. Still a classic.

Free kick fusion

This was a marketing tie in with the recent Gilette Fusion razor (I'm particularly looking forward to their 15 blade razors in 2020). It is a very good game, and comes close to superseding RB in my favourite all-time online football poll - it loses a tad from the lack of variation, though brownie points for the better shooting mechanism and the graphics. It even scores your goals for you. Worth a go.

Play for your club

This is a good game but unbelievably hard to get used to. It's an interboxerised version of the old classic headers and volleys, kind of. A ball comes into the box and you have to volley it into the goal. It's all about timing, and it'll take you a while before you can even kick the thing, let alone get it anywhere near the goal, let alone cause it to make the net bulge. It's worth it - if you ignore the puerile abuse the defenders hurl at you when you miss. A nice touch is the origination of the name - play for your club indeed, where you select your club (even FC United are there) and score points and the cumulative points gained in the name of your club are used to decide your teams league placing, and so forth (albeit, a tad sad).

Pegball

I must admit, i've not played this for a while, but I recall having a few games of this with Lunt in the manchester office circa 2002. It was good then, and it seems to still be now - and it has multiplayer functionality. I challenge you lameheads to a game sometime, when I remember how to play it.

wizzeekizzle

2007-03-04T18:39:00.000Z

as you probably now - because the only people who read this blog are people who i tend to socialise with - it was a bit of a social weekend. one reason being to celebrate my birthday on tuesday (when i become 28, which is ancient). thanks to all concerned for travelling over and so forth, much appreciated.

anyways, in photo form:

Friday

First stop, Sam's Chop House, to meet up with the boy Lunt for beers, in the company of some other work people. Quite a few beers had, it was good.

The main reason why Lunt was promptly in Manchester was for...

...his vist to the Smiths/Morrissy night (or "disco" to use their words) at the Star and Garter. This was his first visit and was in the company of such seasoned regulars as me (fourth visit), sue (third visit) and mike (also third visit). We are faces, everybody looks up to us. Well, they don't really, just thought i'd type that line to make me look important. It was good too. The music was good. The best bits were the ritual hangings, wrist slashing and overdoses that happened, whilst people often spontaneously burst into tears for no apparent reason, when they weren't shouting at someone they suspected of eating meat.

Oops, sorry, my mistake, I was referring to the Lazy Cliche descriptions most people had proffered to me of what a smiths night was like, instead of referring to my own experience of a typical Moz S&G night. It was good and everybody had a good time and listening to some good music you never normally hear anywhere else. Which is good.

THis was followed by a kebab. Fair play, smaje, you've done yourself proud. I know there are many excellent kebab shops in Rusholme, and I know that they are all by and large very good, so much so it generally doesn't matter which one you choose - be it Saajan, Kebabish, Camel One, Abduls, etc. You suggested Rusholme Chippy as it was the best ever. I scoffed at your assertion that it was miles ahead of its competitors, but to be fair, you had a point. It was a quality kebab, troughed happily whilst lunt looked on dejectedly, having finished his no-doubt good abdul's kebab minutes before.

This blog post is bought to you in association with Rusholme CHippy

(I've just noticed the paragraph in this post about kebabs is larger than that on the smiths night. I hope that doesn't bely some unconscious thing).

Speaking of unconscious, Lunt then fell asleep on my settee whilst we watched Family Guy. THe big jessie

Saturday

Saturday was FOOTBALL DAY, containing two of my favourite football traditions:

- United vs Liverpool
- 3pm kick-offs (for FC United that is)

United vs Liverpool will always be to me the biggest match of the season, in the world, ever. And we won it. O'Shea 90'

The game was watched at the social club at Gigg Lane, surrounded by many other United supporters (that's right: FC United IS NOT AN ANTI MUFC thing. It's an anti Glazer/corporatisation thing). We still support United(s) and if you'd've seen the celebrations it would be clear.

Crap performance from united anyhow, but we got the ball in the net one more time than the mickeys did, so we won. Get in.

In fact, I quite like that video. So much so, here it is again in double supra size. In fact, listen to Andy Gray. He sounds devestated.

Then the short hop from the social club to the main stand (well, we didn't hop. We walked. and bought programmes and a copy of Under the Boardwalk on the way) to see FC United vs Colne. We won 6-2 - the third goal, from Rhodri Giggs, being our 100th league goal of the season. It puts us top by 3 points (and four games in hand over our nearest rivals, Salford city). Fine scenes

Football (x2) was followed by trip to the trappiste for some very nice belgian beer. It was good and there were a lot of us and that was also good.

There was no crazy absinthe, unlike last year, so there were no crazy falling over scenes, or puking yourself inside out moments. Unfortunately, there was no score card kept, or rather no score card was completed unlike last year (see here). It was good and banter though, so it was fine.

We rounded off proceedings with a curry, at Rani in Sale, which was good. Lunt slept throughout, but i suppose it could have been worse - that way he couldn't react to the rowdy united fans in the corner.

HAve I ever told anybody how much I like Keema naan? IF you used Keema NAan to make a bacon butty, possibly with some tabasco sauce on it, that would be one fine meal. IT would come with a free ticket to Coronary Bypass Alley though.

sunday

continuing with the food theme (honestly! to look at me you'd think i'd starve or something, honest), we went to the legh for a spot of sunday lunch (we didn't have much choice, the house was nearly uninhabitable after some early morning processing of the previous nights excesses). The sunday lunch at the legh is surprisingly good. So good, I decided to do this doodle of Lunt and Errington respectively on the newspaper somebody had bought:

I think you'll agree i've captured the necessary details perfectly, with the help of colouring in to censor some features i originally drew but then felt inappropriate for public distribution.

ALso...

...is the last pint/alcoholic drink I shall touch until 5.30 on Friday 13 April, when I will have finished my ST5 exam. I think I'm right in saying that is 40 days, give or take one or two. Think of it is a delayed Lent - I am agnostic, therefore I can pick and choose to follow christian susperstitions as i please, and i can move the dates too if i desire. Take that, Jesus.

I am now off work for two days. I intend to spend all that time playing guitar. How exciting. I may even watch all the Kevin Smith movies in one sitting (if I'm right, Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, J&SBSB and Clerks II). My current favourite is Dogma, but I am willing to be persuaded.

Ta-ra

MM

one racist mancunian...

2007-02-20T22:53:00.000Z

bizarre.

(WW people - I think the network people don't let us access youtube anymore, so thats prob why this doesn't work.)

in more serious moz stuff

to quote:

"why do i wave flowers around? they aren't ugly and they don't hurt anyone. its better than waving socks around"

"this charming man is abotu being charming, which is a nice thing to be..... just be charming, what a pleasant world it would be"

but.... "paul morressey"? what an error.

and this is better than errington's impression:

imminent audio danger

2007-02-11T21:16:00.000Z

hello

first, apologies for the lack of posts. after a post-happy december, 2007 has been sparse so far. not that you missed much.

i went snowboard, i didn't die or break anything, i came home, i did some work. last night we went out for our works do. everybody had a lot to drunk. there was lots of chinese food. it was quite good.

today, lunt came around to mine and we made some beautiful music together. i'm not sure whether i should unleash it on the waiting world. it was a deliberatly shoddy 5 minute jam of Smells Like Teen Spirit. It was very shoddy.

As a precursor, I'll put some other mp3s up here now that i did, using my new bass and that multitrack thing i bought ages ago.

before i do, please bear in mind these are mainly me taking the piss and having a bit a laugh. don't take them seriously because i don't. there is potential there though if i could be bothered to do things properly.

1. millhouse of pain (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

i'm going to dub this one "millhouse of pain". chortle. its an attempt at doing some kind of funk, though the awful rock guitar goes a bit far. its better than i thought it first, quite amusing.

2.
johnny b bad (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

an homage to michael j fox's finest moment in back to the future (don't you think his subsequent film career was no great shakes? ahem). this is a song every guitarist should at least have an awareness. if you'll listen to this then you'll see an awareness is all i have. it goes a bit over the top, but it makes me laugh.

3.
butterfly (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

this is me trying to be a bit serious for a minute - a cover of butterfly by weezer. its a good song. i think i do it ok. singing could possibly be better. its ok though.

go on then, i'm sure lunt won't mind:

4.
smells like methylated spirit (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

this is really bad. really bad, but quite funny. the intro, a verse, a chorus, the solo then four minutes of shite. lunt - do you like how i've mixed it? bonus points for anybody who can hear where i slip in the intro to this charming man and also the star spangled banner.

sorry.

i have however updated houseofmill.blogspot.com with some links if you are interested anyhow. enjoy

slope off

2007-01-12T01:08:00.000Z

yes, now going snowboarding for a week. i haven't posted anything for a while 'cos i've been busy. suffice to say for now:

- i won £300 in a poker tournament (See lunt's blog)

- with the proceeds, i bought a new pair of snowboard trousers and also a bass guitar.

here is a good link - andre the giant, one of the greatest drunkards and biggest wrestlers of all time. he has a posse, apparently. a quote from this article:

You won’t find it in the Guinness Book of World Records, but Andre the Giant holds the world record for the largest number of beers consumed in a single sitting. These were standard 12-ounce bottles of beer, nothing fancy, but during a six-hour period Andre drank 119 of them. It was one of the few times Andre got drunk enough to pass out, which he did in a hallway at his hotel. His companions, quite drunk themselves, couldn’t move the big man. Fearing trouble with cops, they stole a piano cover from the lounge and draped it over Andre’s inert form. He slept peacefully until morning, unmolested by anyone. Perhaps the hotel people thought he was a piece of furniture.

stop! christmas time

2006-12-25T22:55:00.000Z

i've eaten too much.

to mark this, see this clip below from the word in 1994.

i quite liked the word. i thought it was good. that may have been down to danni behr though.

i used to like mc hammer between 1990-1991 though.

about the post below....

2006-12-21T00:27:00.000Z

oops, looks like a made a bit of a mess somewhere - in case people couldn't guess, the post below wasn't from me - looks more like it was an email to me that inadvertedly got published on my blog. let me explain...

i am an idiot. i recently added an email address to my blogger profile. instead of adding my regular address, for fear of it getting spammed, i have the option to set up 'forwarding' accounts, thanks to my hosting at backtothemillhouse.co.uk - therefore it would be forwarded to my usual account, the world at large don't know the identity of my usual account and this forwarding address could be binned if it started getting spam.

however, instead of forwarding it to my usual account, i accidentally set it to point to my blog posting address (for those who don't know, you can set up an email address in your blogger settings of the form username.secretword@blogger.com, where any email sent to it is automatically posted on your blog - handy if you want to keep your blog up to date and can send emails from your mobile). So when tonci emailed that expecting for it to end up in my inbox, it actually ended up being published for the world to see.

tonci - sorry about that. fortunately, your email address wasn't posted along with it for the world to see. unfortunately, i have no way of finding out what your email address is either! i don't have my slightly-better-quality mp3 to hand at the moment - when i do, i'll put a comment here, or email me at the address in my profile (this will get to me properly now). i do have an original cd of it somewhere - when i dig it out, i'll reencode at a higher rate. its a good song and it deserves to be preserved at good quality for others to stumble across!

regulars (garts, lunt, mike, pt etc) - ha! take heed that my blog is gaining notoriety. all it takes is for someone to type in "the chicks - daria" (with quotes) in google and my blog IS THE ONLY ENTRY.

i've found your blog via google and...

2006-12-20T20:35:00.001Z

well, i was searching for Chicks' "Daria" - of all
things - and i've stumbled upon your "girly indie"
post. full disclosure: i used to be into indie a bit
in the past, nowadays i'm generally not, but i still
dearly love a handful of tunes i have on dusty old
tapes (mostly taped off of Radio 1). "Daria" is one of
those tunes, and i was so giddy with joy when i found
it - THANK YOU THANK YOU OH THANK YOU!!! :) :) :)

i'm happy enough as it is, but if you could send me a
HQ-ish rip that would be even more fantastic (since
it's rather obscure and hard to find otherwise). i can
upload some other quality girly indie in exchange!

cheers,
tonci

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around

http://mail.yahoo.com

ha ha ha

2006-12-12T10:21:00.000Z

1) i spoke to my neighbours. they didn't hear the guitar thing therefore i'm in the clear

2) hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ha ha ha ha ha

click here (quite big file though) for picture of lunt in usual drunken state

faux pas

2006-12-06T22:40:00.000Z

shit. just did something really stupid. after the united game, decided to go and play guitar. being the considerate neighbour person i am and with it approaching 10 o'clock, i plugged in my headphones. i then played for about 30 mins fairly loudly - as usually happens, the volume gradually increased and the rediculous squeally noise making likewise whilst i became a bit bored and a bit pissed off that i can't play like i used to be able to.

finished, i removed the headphones to hear - the sound of my guitar ringing out through the stereo speakers that i have connected my multitrack to. shit. this means that next door would have heard everything for the last half hour whilst i was oblivious, trapped between two of the biggest headphones you have ever seen.

shit shit shit. i get on fairly well with my neighbours and i don't want to piss them off unnecessarily. not sure what to do - tempted to go round and apologise, but what if i knock on and they ignore it and it makes it worse? what if it wasn't as loud as a thought and they didn't hear it and i look a dick? i've gone for the safe option and written a "whoops, sorry, if you heard a low-rent hendrix swinging cats around, that was me and i didn't realise, i won't do it again" note and stuck it in their letterbox. fair enough? i didn't mean to do it, and i've apologised and i'll stay clear again. can anyone deem me off the hook, or will i burn in hell?

anyway, to turn matters back to quieter times, here are some quieter tunes for your enjoyment.

JImi Hendrix - Angel (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

Even if you don't like Hendrix, listen to this. This is the side of him I much prefer - very soulful and gentle with intricate guitar work and not a squealing cat or acid tab in sight. I'm tempted to expand on this in another post - Little Wing, Castles made of Sand, Axis etc.

Three Dog Night - One Is The Loneliest Number (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

Not much to say but 'tune'.

The Housemartins - Caravan of Love (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

Expect Smajey to include loads of comments pertaining to Hull. A great tune. Just got my hands on their best of. It was a toss up between this and Happy Hour.

Bye

MM

.

2006-12-03T09:17:00.000Z

1) a reminder: houseofmill.blogspot.com, where i shall be dumping links from now on.

2) following on from the exorcist II post, I have recently watched Repossessed, a spoof of the Exorcist featuring Linda Blair (that is, the original possessed one from the Exorcist who gets, wait for it, Repossessed in thie film) and Leslie Neilsen. It is rubbish. But still better than the Exorcist II

3) It was Gaz's leaving do on Fri. Here is his leaving speech. APologies for the bizarre camera work and angles and the dodgy sound.

exorcist II - the heretic

2006-11-25T23:36:00.000Z

sorry for being all smajey, but it's film review time and, boy, what a film.

I wasted two hours watching exorcist II this weekend. I had seen it before (I had even commented on it in my second ever post, I think). I thought I'd give it another chance. Why me, why me - it was awful.

For those of you that haven't seen the original, then do so. It is excellent. One of the best films ever, I reckon. Powerful story, light on the usual stock horror cliches, great effects for the time, great acting and casting. It makes you think, it makes you uncomfortable - especially if you went to church a bit as a kid but are now semi agnostic/atheist, it's not very nice to watch, but it is great.

It's bastard sister, exorcist II, is on the other hand fairly mediocre. Linda Blair is back as Regan (and she's all gone and growed up now), otherwise it is independent of the first film, and nothing to do with the original writers and producers. For the real 'true' sequel, watch Exorcist III, released in 1990, which has a story line that ignores Exorcist II completely.

I gather this film cost Warner Brothers a fortune, several hundred million dollars in 1977 - I paid £13.99 for the Exorcist box set and I feel aggrieved so who knows how they feel?

I don't think I'd be spoiling the original to say that some people died in it. And that there was an exorcism. The second film is four years in the future. The church assign Father Lamont (Richard Burton) to investigate the goings on. Meanwhile, Regan has blossomed (I was relieved to find out afterwards she was 18 when the film was made...) and is in New York, receiving therapy for what has happened. Lamont comes on the scene at the same time her therapist is about to use a revolutionary new device on her - the synchronizer. Two people wear electrode headbands, and stare at a strobe light that pulses more slowly when they are relaxed - by staring at this hypnotic light and relaxing, it gets slower, they get more relaxed - etc. The two people are then sharing thoughts and dreams. Anyhow, they see some bad things. Notably bad acting, bad dialogue and bad make-up.

It transpires that the demon that possessed Regan in the first film is still in there. Somewhere. He has possessed other people too (no rest for the wicked - boom boom!). Lamont has a vision he is flying around africa on the back of a locust. After the vision, he goes to africa and takes communion in some church on top of a hill, then says he had a vision where a dead body could be found. The church think he is evil, so they stone him. He hitches a plane ride (more or less) to some village, where he meets someone who was possessed years ago, but now works in Locust genetics. He goes back to America.

He then goes a bit mad, as does Regan. He goes to the house of the original film in Washington, I'm not really sure why - I don't even think the writers were. The shit hits the fan. They see the demon, who is for some reason dressed and made up exactly like Regan in the first film (I say exactly - that is the intention, but they fell short of the mark). The house falls to pieces and there is a swarm of locusts. In Washington. People scream, someone gets set on fire and dies, Regan cries. Her therapist turns up and they smile. The credits roll. That is about it. Seriously.

This film is responsible for four of the greatest lines ever heard in cinematic history:

1) Lamont: "So, what you've just proved, by science, is that this girl still has a demon inside of her?"

2) Regan: "I used to be possessed by a demon. Oh, it's ok. He's gone now"

3) Lamont: "I have flown this route before. On the wings of an evil locust"

4) Me: "HA ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!............HA ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

If you have a spare few hours and are intrigued, I could lend this to you, but I'm not that cruel. If you haven't seent he first, then watch it. If you have, then skip this one and consider watching the third, Legion. Don't worry about the two prequels, Dominion or The Beginning - they are a rip-off in themselves and could be worthy of another post in their own right.

In the meantime, I'd say watch this instead...

my eyes have seen the glory

2006-11-24T21:58:00.000Z

pretentious or what?

blog #2: houseofmill.blogspot.com

It is just for links and such like, this one will still continue to exist.

Any bets on how long before that one grows stagnant and I merge them together? OR how long before this one grows stagnant and I merge them together?

chugalug

2006-11-20T20:36:00.000Z

two tunes for you this post, by roger miller.

only twigged his name last week (and no, he's neither of rogers Mellie or milla).

The first song was covered by the excellent Ben Kweller when I saw him last week:

Roger Miller - Chug-a-lug (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

It's a fine drinking song: (full lyrics here)

Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug
Make you want to holler hi-de-ho
Burns your tummy, don'tcha know
Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug

Turns out that Roger Miller was the original performer of King Of The Road, as covered by stretchy-vowelled Scottish glasses-wearers The Proclaimers. He also did:

Roger Miller - England Swings (mp3, right-click, save-as), or:

I always wondered who did this - I had some mp3s of a great comedy show Sean Lock did on Radio 4 (15 minutes of misery), and this was the theme tune.

Anyways, more on Roger Miller at wikipedia

ta

MM

end of an era... bah! end!

2006-11-18T17:52:00.000Z

bradbury left work on Friday. he had a leaving do, it was fun. here are some photos:

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/markmillward79/bradbury

also, here are some videos:

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/markmillward79/bradbury/vid1.htm

In other news, I have demonstrated my nerdiness and I now have an internet domain all to myself: www.backtothemillhouse.co.uk - all my photos are collated on there, for what it is worth.

Also, the eagle-eyed amongst will have noticed that I haven't yet fixed the flash on-site MP3 player in my previous post. I'm not going to either. Sorry.

MM

if you see this line, please ignore it... i've only put it in to see if it shows up in search engines. carry on! beileen beng

and there's more

2006-11-13T23:43:00.000Z

i've done a bit of digging and i've worked out a away to put a window here that will allow visitors to play the mp3 s linked to in my last post, like youtube. i hope this works:

To do this, I've had to reencode the mp3s at a better quality (otherwise they played at double speed for some reason). It seems to be ok now.

ok. it doesn't work. i'll fix it soon.

girly indie

2006-11-12T13:48:00.000Z

i was collating some tunes into a playlist on mp3 player the other day and struck on the idea of choosing my favourite inde tunes with girl singers. or something along those lines. i thought i may as well share it here - complete with links to the tracks (the quality is purposefully poor to save space - and hopefully to persuade anybody who downloads these and likes them to go out and obtain them properly so you can have a decent quality listenable version. any record company lawyer types watching - note the above, if you want me to take these down, consider it done.

you can get a list of the links here: link

you can right-click and 'save as...' for each file, though if you click on it, you may well hear a streamed version. i don't know.

- 01 Echobelly - Great Things
A Britpop era band, and very good they were too. Part of the NWONW (New Wave Of New Wave) thing in the pre-Britpop days, before everybody starting wearing adidas and fred perry and thought they may as well start another 'genre'. This appeared on Britpop Now, the excellent BBC2 program summarising all those bands - watch this song here

- 02 Elastica - All Nighter
Another Britpop band. Their first album is ace , I particularly like this one - better than Connection and Line Up in my opinion. The question remains though - is Justine Frischmann fit? 11 years and I still can't figure it out. I think she is. you decide

- 03 Sleeper - What Do I Do Now
yep, another Britpop-era band. This is off their second album, the It Girl and one of my favourite sleeper songs, though I think Smart is generally a better album. Louise Wener is an author now with three books under her belt. Anybody who has seen any footage of Sleeper live will attest that they tend to like to play in cold venues a lot.

- 04 Powder - Afrodisiac
yeah, Britpop band, etc etc - though sounds a bit more like Hole than the Jam/Wire/Kinks albums the rest of the bands were listening too. I like it though, also shown on Britpop Now. The front-woman Pearl is married to the drummer for supergrass.

- 05 Kenickie - In Your Car
A cracking sunderland band who rode on the tails of Britpop. At The Club is an extremely fine album. Montrose gimps it up for charity

- 06 Catatonia - I Am the Mob
See question above about Justine Frischmann.
Catatonia were good, this tune is good, Mulder and Scerlyyyy is also good. Her solo album Cockahoop is also good - recorded after kicking booze and heading to tennesse.

- 07 Lush - Single Girl
I much prefer this post-britpop era lush to their shoegazing stuff. I wasn't sure whether to put this or Ladykillers here. Both are good.

- 08 theaudience - Pessimist Is Never Disappointed
first band of moon-faced pop singer sophie ellis bextor. they were actually really bloody good but split after one album so SEB could pursue a career of mediocrity.

- 09 The Chicks - Daria
the chicks. three young northern irish girls, think there were all about 15 when they released this EP in 1998. they toured with ash. they didn't do anything else. a shame.

- 10 Charlotte Hatherley - Kim Wilde
former ash woman, though she recorded this whilst with the band. When I saw Ash in 1997, before Nu-clear sounds came out, I think it was only her second gig with the band. By all accounts, she received death-threats for the first few years from girly ash fans obsessed with tim wheeler.

- 11 Bis - Kandy Pop
i think it was a john peel fave in 96. they got a lot of attention for going on TOTP before being signed. ultimately fizzled into nothing. ON chemikal underground records, if that means anything. Scottish. Think they may be mates of Belle and Sebastian. Or simple minds. or someone up there.

- 12 Helen Love - Debbie Loves Joey
some welsh woman who does some great stuff. the debbie and joey in question are debby harry and joey ramone

- 13 Talulah Gosh - Beatnik Boy
Twee mid-80S band from oxfordshire (i think). They were on that NME C86 compilation. A favourite band of Graham Coxon apparently. Very Jangly.

- 14 Heavenly - P.U.N.K. Girl
This is a cheat - half of Talulah Gosh went on to form Heavenly, which was a kind of more-polished version of Talulah Gosh. They were on K Records in America, home of jangly and indier-than-thou bands.

- 15 The Aislers Set - my boyfriend could be a spanish man
Kind of like a current day American version of Tallulah Gosh

- 16 Weezer - I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams
Another cheat - whereas Weezer are normally a bloke only band, they got in Petra Haden to sing this song (apparently it was written from a girl's perspective). petra guested on loads of bands albums in the california area during the 90s, as did her sister rachel, a violin player. she was in the rentals, an offshoot of weezer. she's done some solo stuff too - including an album that covers all of the who sell out, using nothing but her own voice - she 'sings' all the instruments. it's pretty good for a few listens at least.

- 17 The Vaselines - Son Of A Gun
another semi-cheat - half of this is sung by a bloke. Nirvana covered this on Incesticide - they were a favourite band of Kurt's. From Scotland apparently, so probably friends of Simple Minds too, and possibly Wet Wet Wet and the Proclaimers.

- 18 Saturday Looks Good To Me - Meet Me By The Water
Sound a bit like The Aisler's Set.

- 19 The Fiery Furnaces - Im Gonna Run
the lead singer eleanor some-onE-or-other is the missus of alex kapranos. i saw hot hot heat in dec 03, the bill being fiery furnaces, then franz ferdinand then hhh. i presume that is the tour on which they met. franz ferdinand were ac, of course i'd not heard anything (except, i think, darts of pleasure). fiery furnaces are hit and miss IMO , but i like this.

- 20 Mint Royale - Dont Falter
Oops, another semi-cheat - this is sung by Lauren Laverne (of Kenickie), but I'm happy to include it as she didn't song on their song I've posted here.

- 21 Annie - Chewing Gum
some anaemic scandinavian singer. its probably a bit far fetched calling this indie, but i quite like it

- 22 Sissy Bar - Gin and Juice
i've never heard of them before or since. this is a cover of a snoop dogg song but it's really good, in the same vein as heavenly or something.

- 23 Kate Nash-The Shit Song demo
saw her support ben kweller the other week. some young cockney gel, a mate of lily allen apparently, but kate is better.

- 24 The Slits - I Heard It Through the Grapevine
A superb dub/punk cover of this motown classic. It took me a while to like the vocal style, but now this is one of my favourite covers ever.

- 25 The Moldy Peaches - D.2. Boyfriend
original band of kimya dawson (and adam green). she is solo now, and on K records (home of heavenly, above). listen to the lyrics and the words in them though - except for the first verse about her mates all pretending to be going out with members of duran duran (hence the name which is really D^2 boyfriend), the rest are pretty cool.

so theres yous haves its. i would label controversial tracks as 4,9,11,19,21,22 or 25, though give them a go.

wtf

2006-11-05T20:10:00.000Z

that posh english butler guy, Jeffrey, from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air has been appearing in Eastenders this week.

Bizarre.

edit: and now madge from neighbours is in emmerdale. i'll say it again: wtf?

nyc

2006-11-03T21:43:00.000Z

you can find a link to some photos from my recent New York trip here. I'll put up a descriptive post some time soon.

Note how, being the geek I am, I made that website myself. Flickr or Photobucket it ain't, but at least I can sleep soundly, safe in the knowledge that I love wasting my time making pointless things like that.

Continuing the geek note, the photos were all taken with my camera phone and shrunk down from 2 megapixel to about 1 to save space, otherwise I think they look pretty good for a basic camera.

edit: whilst i'm in the mood, i've reindexed my germany snaps here.

double edit: maine road fc 1 - fc united 2. let's all laugh at city.... www.maineroad.co.uk

hoist up the john b sail

2006-10-22T15:09:00.000+01:00

two uniteds but the soul is one:

ntfc 2 mufc 3 - http://www.fc-utd.co.uk/story.php?story_id=611 - late comback from 2-1 down after keeper got stretchered off and replaced with our centre forward.

mufc 2 - lfc 0 - paul scholes, he scores goals, grabs one and the wobbly gobbed tosser goes part of the way to redeeming the fact he is an utter twat by volleying an exquisite second.

two of the sweetest things in life: watching united come back from behind in the last minute against all odds, and watching united beat the bindippers i mean liverpool. both happened this weekend, albeit in two different matches. ecstatic. come on united.

two dogs with two hands

2006-10-05T22:18:00.000+01:00

inspired by OG's post about meeting stinks of piss - er, i mean alan shearer, i've thought about it and i reckon it's worth me posting an extract from a book i'm reading about FC United (sorry, yes, them again).

the book is called "an undividable glow" and is written by one of the old united fanzine writers, rob brady. his style is, er, unique. mr brady - if you are reading this, the book is excellent. apologies for quoting a passage of it verbatim.

picture the scene - early in the season, after amatch, a french camera crew are making a news item about the formation of FC United. After taking in the game, they decamp to a pub to interview some fans, and also some players, who unlike their premiership counterparts, are happy to mix with the riff raff from the terraces:

Two out of the three buses that left Chorlton Street in town for the game stayed behind at the Easy and Slow pub in Northwich after the game for a few beers. They were joined in by many more in cxars, including those cars driven by the players. REds were being mithered by camera Monsieurs from FRench television. They were begrudgingly accepted, mainly due to the fact of who they weren't. They weren't some knob from Sky who cannot seem to film anyone who isn't wearing a football shirt or a team coloured wig. They were also more accepted as the beer went down.

THey went live at one point with the lights for the cameras searing down on Rory Patterson. THe cameras whirred as the broadcaster asked serious questions of our talented forward player. There was a silence around the pub as the questions and answers Agincourt arrowed about. At this point, our Daz leaves our company and goes up to the side of Rory PAtterson and into the intense glare of the cameras lights. He starts to nudge Rory's arm going: "Rory, ROry." The interviewer continued like a professional and so did Rory ignoring the bowlign ball armed interview intruder. The intruder was not going to go away. "Rory, Rory." The nudges turned into gentle shakes that turned into persistent small scale shoving that resulted in Rory Patterson sort of 'D Day landing craft' rocking as he tried to answer the live French television questions. it was only a matter of time before they would have to accede to the uintruder's request for attention. It came seconds later.

At an impasse between French question and FC United of Manchester player answer, there fell a silence where it was impossible not to have been worn down by the intruders insistence. ROry Patterson turned to Daz, the French live cameras turned to Daz, the French interviewer turned to Daz, the French lights turned to Daz, the ammassed Red clientiel in the pub turned to Daz, the rest of the assorted FC United of Manchester players, management staf and board turned to Daz, our corner containing all his mates turned to Daz. What was so important that he had to go up and pursue and pursue the socially unacceptable unpursuable? In that moment of dead air television that is interminable Daz puts on hist most sincere voice, his most quizzical stance, his most interested face and confidently long balls ount into the world the question: "Have you ever wanked a dog off? Two dogs, two hands?"

Apologies, but that story still makes me laugh at loud, and i'm not really sure why.

my health vs the daily mail

2006-10-03T15:15:00.000+01:00

well, (un)fortunately, the doc says I am ok so I am to go back to work tomorrow (Weds) morning. I've been out of hospital since Fri. Saw the doc yesterday and he said I'd be ok for a weds return. To be fair, I'm just pleased I'll be walking into work with both legs, but there you go.

I should explain - thanks to the wonders of private medical insurance, I was treated in a private hospital. This also meant my doc's appointment was with my consultant at said hospital. Now, as you may expect, the choice of newspapers in the waiting room didn't expend to the sun, mirror, sport, et al. It was a little on the right side of things, unsurprising given the sort of person you may expect to use private healthcare. The papers available were the Torygraph and the Daily Mail.

Ah, the Daily Mail. I always like to read this paragon of virtue because it is just so ridiculous, and represents the outraged voice of middle England. It didn't disappoint - the headline informed the reader how illegal immigrants cost the British Taxpayer £3.3 billion each year. Or something like that. Y'know, the usual stuff.

It was the letters page that had me first open mouthed, then in stitches. It said, and I'm trying my best to quote word-by-word from memory:

"I see John Prescott will be issuing a formal apology on behalf of Britain for it's involvement in the slave trade. Am I right to presume we will be receiving an apology from Africa for all the missionaries that were eaten?"

Unbelievable. I only wish I had cut out this gem to keep as proof, as I am struggling to find a link to it on the internet. Un. be. leiv. able. It's so wrong, I don't even know where to start.

However, I did have a cursory glance around the Daily Mail website, and found this story Vicar branded racist.... I love the indignant tone, like he hasn't done anything wrong. I guarantee this one will leave you open mouthed too.

I tells you. If ever there was a reason to not vote Conservative (note that I vote neither red or blue), The Daily Mail is that reason.

suck

2006-09-23T22:52:00.000+01:00

for those that don't know my old leg injury flared up again on
thu.timing is shit.not only am i missing a trip to washington dc this
week (business and pleasure), i also missed FCUM's game today.

thank god for modern antibiotics and medical insurance,or i may have
been looking at half price footwear in the future.thing is,i'm not
really joking either.

normal service resumed in a week or so.

hello

2006-09-18T23:19:00.000+01:00

1. as you can see, i've reformatted my blog template again. i like it, but i'll probably change my mind in a few days (again). if you see the links on the right as blue, then apologies, they come up as white in firefox for me (which i intended). therefore live with the bad contrast or download firefox. it is good.

2. fc united beat curzon ashton 3-1 tonight. that's 11 wins from 11. get in reds.

3. fc united also won at the weekend. our fourth goal, from rory patterson, was a delight - we conceded, we kicked-off, rory shot.... and got it in from the half-way line. a delightful goal, and luckily for you (and me) it's been captured for posterity here:

http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?docid=3042319092715956403

(or, if you have a fast connection, you can download it - 11meg - from here)

enjoy

stand and deliver

2006-09-08T09:10:00.000+01:00

oh adam ant. i was a little bit young to catch him first time round (though I do seem to recall having a cassette of 80s hits when I was about 4 that contained Apollo 9). Of course, he is responsible for the classic song, Stand And Deliver:

I'll say this before Mike does: his band had two drummers, you know.

This song in itself is not the reason for this post. I had a wonderful story proved right yesterday. Before I start, you may know that Adam Ant has had a history of mental problems lately and depression etc, so I do feel a guilty about bringing this to your attention, but I reckon it's still worth posting.

Apparently, since being a nipper, Adam Ant (real name: Stuart Goddard) has been a fan of gorillas. He was approached a few years back (or maybe he did the approaching?) by a gorilla charity (i belive set up by the woman featured in Gorillas In The Mist - and I'm not talking about Sigorney Weaver). As a result, he recorded a charity song which was called, as I'm guessing those of you at the back have already guessed, Save The Gorilla. Here in all its glory, is a video for this song, featuring some Gervais-esque dancing and accompanied by Morrissey's guitarist Boz Boorer:

Quite a good cover of it as it goes, and some of the lyrical changes are excellent ("save the gorilla, your money for their lives, hide the gorillas, no bullets or a knife")

My favourite bits though are the gorilla grunting at 1:30 and 2:15 and the replacement of "dandy highwaymen" with "gorilla men" at the end.

common people

2006-09-01T21:58:00.000+01:00

common people by pulp is undoubtedly a fine song. it also has a fine video:

However, it is an even better beast when performed live:

This is taken from the excellent Britpop Now! program originally shown in 1995 (I have a scratchy VHS copy of this somewhere), and is based on the album version, which has an extra version to the single accompanying the video above.

This performance is one of the best live performances I've ever seen of any song ever. Jarvis is quite the performer and has one hell of a presence. As well as being captivating and also funny, it is only from watching this video that i realised common people is actually a song with a lot of anger in it. fascinating stuff.

but, from the sublime to the rediculous:

...this time in the shape of everybody's favourite fidgety orange star fleet commander William Shatner (along with Joe Jackson). This is a live cover version of Common People and I can't decide if it is good or awful. Both, I think.

I'm a bit worried. I went shopping to Tesco before and whilst lumping loads of bags around I think I have killed the index finger on my left hand. The tip is still numb. Hmmm. If it doesn't get any better, you can call me Beadle.

from the phone of geek,courtesy of my mp3 player

2006-08-29T22:24:00.000+01:00

like a broken arrow i catch the tail wind and draw the clouds
burning sugar, as black as smoke
enclosing walls
i open my heart
she sings when she hurts
it's good to sink deep inside,it's my only touchstone
she's a friend in the dark:my strength,my memories
she delights in torture but she holds my hand and never shields me
because the best shield is to accept the pain
then what can reallydestroyme?

instrumentals and oz... wtf?! lol rofl omfg lol!!

2006-08-18T18:39:00.000+01:00

in true high-fidelity style, i present to you a top 5 instrumental tracks list. inspired whilst listening to the resultant number 1 whilst studying yesterday night (and I must say, Dark Side of The Moon is also a quality study soundtrack* - see below for some good video).

I even present some mp3s here for you to download. Apologies for the poor quality - I need to save space. Without further ado... edit: actually, i've removed the mp3s now. sorry. try your local neighbourhood p2p software

5. Alan Hawkshaw - Beat Me Til I'm Blue
A quality tune, which you'll probably recognise (I think the correct artist name is The Mohawks - Mo' Hawks = More Hawkshaw - get it?). Top tune anyway. Dunno what genre this technically is - don't think it's quite funk - I think I've heard it called 'boogaloo' in some quarters. yikes.

4. DJ Shadow - Building Steam With A Grain of Salt
From DJ Shadow's excellent Entroducing album. Again, you may recognise this from being used as backing/incidental music in a few programmes. I really like it. If I ever listen to it whilst walking home in the dark it makes me think that I'm in some kind of movie and that some punk ass thugs are gonna try and hand out a beating. Or something. It was a close call between this and Organ Donor, off the same album (or a remix of Organ Donor which I also have). Excellent tunes.

3. Incredible Bongo Band - Apache
Now this is a top tune, and fortunately not the Shadows version, so no synchronised stepping-whilst-playing here. Guaranteed floor filler. Spawned a thousand sampled rap beats.

2. Bert Jansch - Angie
A completely different change of tack - this is a rather good acoustic-only song. Bert Jansch is an astonishing guitar player. I assure this is played on only one guitar though it sounds like more than that. This is a traditional song, so it is really a cover, if you will. Debate rages if it should be spelt Angie or Anji. Who cares.

1. Frank Zappa - Peaches en Regalia
I find this track absolutely riveting and it always leaves me speechless (but not now, unfortunately). The first track of Zappa's first solo album, Hot Rats. I'm reluctant to use this word but.... it is jazz fusion, apparently. Don't let that put you off. It's excellent, a very complex arrangement but very melodic and full of hooks. The majority of Hot Rats is instrumental, and Son of Mr Green Genes wouldn't be far off this top five, nor We Are Not Alone from Man From Utopia, nor What's New In Baltimore, etc etc. This is the best though.

Oh, and a bonus track for you... Jimi Hendrix - Born Under A Bad Sign. This is an instrumental, but it is a version of a non-instrumental blues song, and a very good one it is too.

* Speaking of Dark Side of The Moon, anybody heard of the urban myth that it synchs very nicely with The Wizard of Oz (to form, I suppose, The Dark Side of The Rainbow)? I was a bit sceptical, but it certainly seems to sync in places, in particular each song change is accompanied by a change in scene. I heard about this ages ago but only saw it for the first time last night, as some kind soul has put it on Google Video here. Even if you aren't a fan of Pink Floyd, I can recommend giving this a quick watch or skipping through it, if only to see how Time (from around 8 minutes) and The Great Gig In The Sky (from around 16 minutes) syncs when the twister happens (and Money when it lands).

More info about this can be found here

.

2006-08-14T09:02:00.000+01:00

oh youtube, so much to answer for. a 30-min documentary on the smiths:

or watch it separately here

in other news, was in bournemouth at the weekend for mate's stag do (oh, from morrissey to moribund in one post...). it was a top weekend but bournemouth is a bit benidorm and full of rent-a-chav bars. good laugh though, crawled into bed at 5, left hotel at 9.30 for taxi, train, plane, taxi combo home. fortunately, i'd already booked today as holiday, so holiday i shall.

2006-08-06T10:00:00.000+01:00

see if this works

ok, it is true. i am a nerd. just installed linux on my pc. it has this feature where I can post on my blog without going through the whole blogger thing, so I am testing it out. tada (?!)

anyways, what has happened.

last saturday, went to nottingham. a fine weekend. beer and pizza on friday, barbecue and beer on saturday then some club afterwards. drunken antics abound - (my youtube vids).

not good afterwards. Managed to find some CUNTS in macdonalds at 3 in the morning who started taking the piss out me behind my back. Here's a lesson, lads - I may be a fat cunt, as you so cleverly managed to observe (and there's me thinking I'm Mr fucking bean) but i'm not fucking deaf you fucking spikey-haired collar-up deansgate-lock-esque "i'm so fucking smart, i managed to read an entire issue of Zoo once" cunts. Ahem. sorry (mother). Anyways, for once in my life I stood up to these utter testicle-heads and gave them a piece of my mind. no violence though, though I was severely tempted (and I sense they were) but deep down as well as being a fat cunt and I'm a sensible little boy who respects authority too much and I don't think a black eye or bruised knuckles (probably the former) would enhance my cherubish good looks. I just hope the next soul they pick on substitutes my sensibleness (i.e. wimpishness) with a fucking big punch to your fucking boyband faces you utter cunts.

I bet they had a right laugh emailing their fucking mates on monday morning inbetween taking calls and making tea. the cunts

as you may tell, it rather annoyed me.

as for the rest of the week, fc united played halifax on tues. I didn't go (oh, such a glory hunter! in my defence i did go to the leigh friendly yesterday, stood in the rain on an open terrace for my sixth preseason friendly this year - it'll never last, it'll be over by christmas - where will they be on a rainy afternoon on an open terrace? er, on an open terrace, naturally). anyways, i digress. steve torpey grabbed a classic goal, by all accounts - no vids to recount this as i speak, but his performance was so good that halifax offered him a contract on weds, and by Friday he signed as a full time player for them.

Fair play to him, Torpey (oh, and that's this Steve Torpey, not that Steve Torpey) is a cracking player who deserves a shot at playing at a higher level - undoubtedly he was always going to move if the opportunity came a-calling, and can't blame him that he's decided to step up to the Conference. He was certainly one of the best players in FC's inaugural season, bagging 19 goals, many of them screamers, including our first ever goal away at Flixton (fifteen yard run, then lashing it into the corner from twenty yards). OK, I don't want to be all "gartside-4-shearer" but he is a veritable hero and prominent figure in the history of FC United (albeit a scouser).

Anyways, to savour that Torpey magic, some for your delectation: you tube (again)

Aside from that, like I say, was at Leigh RMI yesterday to see FC run out 4-0 victors over our Unibond league counterparts - two leagues higher than us. Not bad. Around 1,000 souls turned out to watch us on the aforementioned rainy terrace. A totally different atmosphere to our game there last july in the baking sunshine. Still, even with the departure of Torpey, I'm confident we can have another successful season. After a handful of appearances last season, Swarbrick looks like he's a good addition (and rapid with it). Rudd yet to prove himself, but his record speaks for itself. New signings Matty Taylor looks class at right-back, Sam Ashton looks handy in goal and Steve Smith had a good game yesterday. We shall see.

Just realised that the last four paragraphs probably mean nothing to anybody but me. apologies.

otherwise, went to the Star and Garter in Manchester on Friday night - for a Smiths/Morrissey disco. I know some will disagree, but it really is a cracking night and full of fine tunes. Lunt, you have to haul yourself up to this at some stage, its ace.

For now, ta-ra

i said i'd do it...

2006-07-02T12:05:00.000+01:00

for your delectation...

roberto baggio's magical kicks

ahem

2006-06-25T19:06:00.000+01:00

please excuse some technical difficulties. being the smart arse that I am, i've started messing with the template thingy. its not quite right and probably doesn't work in places, but i've spent too long on it at the minute and i can't be arsed finishing it, so please just put up with it.

i'm quite pleased with the logo though.

thank you for the days/weeks/months

2006-06-18T13:25:00.000+01:00

sorry, a bit of a hiatus there, but I'M BACK. ta.

been busy and the like - so much to report (kind of).

1. The phonely one I know

first off, i lost my phone. i left, lunt-style, in the back of a taxi and it hasn't been seen since. i barred it, vodafone told me i was insured (i was almost insistent i wasn't but kept my mouth shut) so a new phone arrived with me 36 hours later. not bad work.

i wasn't too fussed about losing the phone (and now 'cos i have a new one, it's not scuffed like my old one, the camera lens isn't scratched like the last one was and the adapter stuff doesn't wobble), but i did lose the 1gb memory card that was in it. As well as forking out £25 for a new one (though they did used to cost £40), I lost all the photos on it. Luckily I backed up most of them, or at least had small version of them (compressed to go on this blog), plus I had geekily saved all my contacts (NERD). It could've been worse I suppose.

Anyways, that meant I was without a camera, so unable to take photos for new item NUMBER 2 folks

2. ZAPPA PLAYS ZAPPA

Finally, this gig happened - after holding the ticket for a year and withstanding one rearrangement. It was pretty good actually. For the uninitiated, it was a band put together by Dweezil Zappa, the son of the late (and SOME say great Frank Zappa), playing a selection of his father's 'hits' (for want of a better word). I liked it. It was a bit widdly in places, but that band are TIGHT - some of the best musicians I've ever seen, playing lots of weird time signatures and improvisation and, er JAZZ FUSION, great googly moogly. Highlight for me was Zappa band man, singer, saxophonist and seemingly dancer NAPOLEON MURPHY BROCK who, even in his sixties(?) was quite a performer. Dweezil is an exceptional guitar player, but he was greatly surpassed by Steve Vai (I think many of the capacity audience were there to see him).

PLUS POINTS OF THE NIGHT
Hearing lots of zappa music I knew (In particular, the Yellow Snow suite)
Hearing lots of zappa music I didn't know (Inca Roads = Fine tune)
Seeing some great musicianship
Not feeling like a total muso when trying to count time signatures - knowing that most of the audience was probably doing the same
Realising my D36 ticket was in the second row

BAD POINTS
Realising that my D36 ticket was in the second row on the far left. Behind a speaker stack.
Only being able to see Steve Vai's forehead when he played
Then realising he pulled stupid faces when he played anyway

All in all a good night, but alas, a photo free one.

3. Futureheads. like.

Went to see the futureheads (like) at the academy the following day. They were good, new album sounds good (i must listen to that copy you burnt me smaje). And a picture!

..then on to the brickhouse

4. Other stuff (a.k.a. not much other stuff)

Aside from that, not much else to report really. There is that world cup thing going on, or something, but quite frankly I'm sick to death of jug-eared/hyperactive/scouse/English Irishmen/condascending/anoraky/has-been twits telling me what i should be thinking about Wayne Rooney's foot or 'Our Boys'. Fuck off. It's a perfectly good football tournament, there are 32 teams in it, let's not forget that.

And whilst I'm fishing, I may as well end off with an ARGENTINA

Oh, one more thing - my tune of the moment is a great dub/punk cover of Heard it through the grapevine by the Slits available here.... It's ace. edit: no longer available... too late i'm afraid!

best player ever

2006-05-29T09:53:00.000+01:00

diego maradona - ok, he's screwed himself up with a mixture of cocaine and pies and air rifles, but surely on of the best players ever?

twats at socceraid. yeah, nice one, by all means (...) cheer every touch robbie williams has but boo every touch maradona has? fucking imbeciles. you get back to your facepaints and stetsons, if you don't appreciate the presence of such a player, albeit way after his heyday, then you shouldn't be at a football match.

look at this (courtesy of youtube) - not only does he score arguably the best goal ever, but look at some of this skill. i don't understand why he is rarely talked off that highly over here, always being overlooked by (admittedly great players such as) pele et al. true class should recognise the class of this man on the football field.

fold'em

2006-05-27T16:14:00.000+01:00

http://www.papercdcase.com

Does the job very nicely indeed.

whoops, there goes another year

2006-05-21T15:04:00.000+01:00

billy bragg - if you don't know the guy then you really should. a video for 'greetings to the new brunette' from the 80s. a fine tune

otherwise, precious little else to report. enjoy

p.s. just found this, which i prefer (aside from the dubious shirt). new england, live on the tube:

p.p.s. just found this, which i also think is great. kirsty maccoll's cover of new england.

going loko

2006-05-15T09:39:00.000+01:00

finally back from a stormer of a weekend away in germany (germany, germany, we're the famous fc united and we're going to germany). fair to say it was full of incident, beer, incident and late nights. in summary:

got a supporters coach down on thurs afternoon to east midlands with 70 other fans and my mate same. some singing on a very cramped coach before arriving early in the area - cue a stop at a very accomodating nearby pub. four pints and one hour later, we are in the airport. one burger king meal later and i am on plane, full of singing united fans. (i admit, i felt sorry for the handful of non-united fans there who must have been a bit peeved with us, but it was all good natured and a good time was had by all.)

once in berlin, we found the hotel, dumped bags, and went out for a few beers, only out (...) til around two ish. it was deliberately low key, but good banter all the same and practice ("enschuldigen sie bitte. ich mochte zwei grosse bier bitte. vielen dank", and the like).

we got the train over to leipzig at 11.30. this was after a half eaten continental breakfast at the hotel, supplemented by a beer and a currywurst (german bratwurst sliced up and served with ketchup and curry powder - a true delicacy) at the station...

... arriving at 2, we found our hotel in leipzig and proceeded to wander around for an hour looking for the main square. we spotted a few fc united fans, so said hello and had a few drinks with them. then we left and joined up with some other fc fans. a few more beers, a few songs and its on the way to the game.

and what a journey to the game! we boarded a tram (the number 15 to meusdorf, alighting at prosbedietha), to be met with hundreds of lokomotiv leipzig fans, all jumping up and down and shaking hands with united fans. scarfs were swapped. songs were sung. it was utterly breathtaking and such fun. unfortunately, the tram refused to move (it was bouncing up and odwn at the time). so we got out and walked. it turned out the number of people had surprised the police and the tram drivers, so more police were called to oversee everything (though, there was never a hint of trouble, and they were only there to control the crowd). the mad celebrations continued all the way into the ground.

the ground was rather decrepit - a 15,000 capacity old east european athletics stadium that should probably have been torn down with the wall. we were allowed to drink beer on the terraces though. there were 7,500 fans in total; we estimate around 500 united fans. we kitted it out in plenty of fc united flags:

me and sam fastening our flag. hi mum!

the match was a cracker - it finished four all (we went 1-0 up, then 2-1 down, then 2-2, 3-2 down, 4-3 up and finally 4-4). we were the better side though and looked awesome. the lok and fc fans exchanged songs over the eighties style fenced terraces and the players come over to celebrate.

another manic tram ride to hotel and a freshen up later, and we're in Leipzig's biggest night club, officially accosted by Lokomotiv for the night. It was huge, though not the normal place i'd go (it was a bit dancey), though it was only 2.5 euros for a beer. However, most of the travelling united contingent and a fair few lok fans, plus all the players and officials of both sides, also made the journey. again, it was fantastic. players joined fans dancing on tables and singing songs. lok fans and fc united fans rubbed shoulders and traded songs and beers. (one particuarly excitable lok fan jumped up and down shouting "fuck liverpool! fuck liverpool!", which i concentrated on at 5.35 yesterday, the scouse gets). all in all, a top top top night and probably my best experience as a fc fan yet! Finally crawled in at 4.

after a breakfast of bratwurst, we got train back to berlin (german trains are ace by the way - all wood panelling and smoked glass and bags of leg room), and back to our original hotel and met sam's mates. we eschewed the cup final - a nearby pub was showing it but there were too many liverpool fans there for my liking, plus it was a baking hot day and the pub wasn't the most attractive option. we wandered around, had a few beers and took in a lot of berlin which is truly a fascinating city. we sidled up to the reichstag and found a cracking bar called the strand (german for beach) - they'd basically modelled it on a beach, complete with sand and deck chairs.

oh, and points of note include a cracking mural for a nike advert - complemented here with a mural of che guevara and fidel castro from a cuban bar later that night. hasta la victoria siempre.

being the culture vultures that we are, we decided on having an authentic german meal, so found a great restaurant. i had some chicken dish with lambsalat (some kind of potato and asparagus 'coleslaw' thing, i gather) to start and sauerbrat (beef boiled in vinegar) and sauerkraut as a main, which was absolutely ace. german food, and beer, is fantastic.

a taxi ride to the bar area of town later, and we're in a bar. i get talking to sam's mates who are all good lads (and lasses). turns out one of the lasses is a dedicated indie snob like myself. a big fan of the smiths and a regular at the star and garter. she said we should all come along some time - though she warned it is very very busy now and full of teenybopper students with thorough haircuts though, and it is best to get there early - 9pm usually, or even earlier for the smiths nights, which apparently are often full of people who have travelled from other countries to be there.

further to this, we went in pursuit of an indie club someone in our party ahd been to before. we coudlnt' find it, but did bump into a very friendly group consisting of some germans, swedes, fins and an australian, who took us to a different indie club which was excellent (we didn't even get there til half one). it was ace - lots and lots of excellent tunes (futureheads, maximo park, bloc party, artic monkeys, libertines/babyshambles

/dirtyprettythings, morrissey, franz ferdinand, pixies, violent femmes et al) - i'm not sure if the germans got all the lyrics but being the efficient english speakers they are, i'm sure they did. again, it was a cheap place, so plenty of beer was drunk before leaving at five. our group of 11 had whittled down to five at this stage. we hailed a taxi, hoping to squeeze five in, when to our surprise, he got out, opened the boot, rooted around and somehow magically converted the car into an eight seater. i don't know how he did this. i think it was a special brand of secret german magic, but i was happy with this and went home and slept.

morning started with a British breakfast (sorry, how crass) at a nearby german restaurant. It did have a german take on it though - the bacon was sweet, the sausages mini-bratwursts, the fried bread unfried (and untoasted). the beans were odd though - beans yes, but no tomato sauce like here, but served with cooked cherry tomotoes. it worked well. i am unsure about the salad that accompanied it though.

then we did the tourist thing. we took in a boat ride on the river where i saw the reichstag again. we saw numerous cathedrals and museums, before strolling down unter den linten and taking in all the magnificent buildings that lined it, before finally arriving at the brandenburg gate. we saw the reichstag (again) and the strand bar (again) before grabbing some food (again, german - wiener schnitzel with asparagus, very nice) and then a taxi to tegel and a plane to manchester and home home home.

all in all a cracking and exhausting trip. well worth it. and well worth taking today off work too.

currently listening to: "popped in souled out" by wet wet wet*
current musical tip: "rockin' all over the world" by status quo*

*may not actually be true

i just want to see the boy happy

2006-05-09T21:45:00.000+01:00

echoes of Mike's blog ahoy - it's a review of the Morrissey gig at the Apollo on Sat 6 May. What a surprise.

It was a top gig, better than the Lowry in my opinion, though both set lists did drop a bit in the last third. I do like the Apollo, I've decided - in the past I was a bit unsure about it (though my next gig, seeing Frank Zappa's sons destr... er, play their father's work, is seating, so we shall see). I managed to force myself quite close to the front, stage right, and got some good pictures:

I particularly like the first, and the yellow patterny thing on the second (i am a sad bastard). The third is included only to illustrate he changed shirts three times. how vain.

what did puzzle me though was the fact that Morrissey's entrance on stage was preceded by You'll Never Walk Alone - roundly greeted, perhaps unsurprisingly from a Manchester audience, with a chorus of boos. An odd choice - I know it was played for non-football reasons (or at least I guess it was) - but I'd've thought it obvious it was only going to be received one way (and I'd've though someone who's recorded songs called Munich Air Disaster 1958 and Roy's Keen would've recognised this). Still, it's his show and his decision so fair does to him. The other songs were better though:

First Of The Gang To Die
Still Ill
You Have Killed Me
The Youngest Was The Most Loved
I Will See You In Far-off Places
My Life Is A Succession Of People Saying Goodbye
Girlfriend In A Coma
On The Streets I Ran
At Last I Am Born
Life Is A Pigsty
Trouble Loves Me
To Me You Are A Work Of Art
Ganglord
A Song From Under The Floor Boards
I Just Want To See The Boy Happy
How Soon Is Now?

Encore - Irish Blood, English Heart

Then, as Mike said, this was followed by a trip to the Brickhouse. It was mint, good to see the place busy for once and the music was, as expected, ace. Plenty of Smiths and Morrissey classics and some other notable inclusions (What Do I Get by the Buzzcocks and Blister In The Sun by Violent Femmes are always welcome in my back - thinking back these were played early on on, perhaps an indication the red stripe began to take over shortly after).

However, for once I wasn't the one falling asleep. However, as ever, Lunt was the one falling asleep.

Look. Just look at him. Not only is he asleep, standing up, but he is sneering, as if in a defiant gesture to those still capable of keeping eyes open. I salute this man.

Well, I say that, he had managed to rip his trousers somehow and, yes as alleged in a comment on Mike's blog, I did manage to sew them up for him. He was quite pleased with the job too. So pleased that he sat down only to be accompanied by a loud 'rip'. Dah well. It happens.

before,during,after

currently listening to: a hastily produced bootleg of saturday's performance - from the morrissey-solo.com forums

current musical tip: er, i dunno. frank zappa, yeah, frank zappa. get hot rats, that's good, or possibly apostrophe or over-nite sensation, they're ace. Thing-fish is not one for first-timers, neither is civilisation phase III but they are good in their own right.

hello

2006-05-01T13:48:00.000+01:00

friday - billy bragg at the bridgewater hall. bloody brilliant, then went for beer at the brickhouse, followed by bacon butties in the bore*

*bore being welsh for morning.

all you fascists are bound to lose

then off to see FC's last game of the season played at Boundary Park, against Padiham (though after watching United lose to Chelsea in the pub). I very much doubt that landlord of the White Hart reads this, but in case you do: "ARGENTINA". ahem. apologies to any little englanders who get upset by that comment.

anyhow, a 2-1 win ended the season off nicely.

it'll never last. it'll be over by christmas.

i'm missing a friendly in telford next week to see MOZ again. At the apollo. Standing tickets - have that, you ebay touting scum. Should be ace.

so, went home, packed quickly, went to airport, flew to gatwick, got taxi to croydon, slept in hotel, then went to pub and on to the wedding of my friends Julia and Ben. It was a cracking do and I got to see some faces i'd not seen for a while.

oh, and the bar was free as well. that would explain why i nearly had to reach for the sick bag on the plane back this morning.

i am the worst wedding photographer ever:

Julia, nick, big dave, and my right cheek.

ah well, a free afternoon. as soon as i click the publish post, i'm going to have a cup of tea and watch a film, though i'm not sure what yet - safe to say it won't be exorcist ii, or iii. then off to united vs boro, but tell the truth i really can't be arsed.

currently listening to: not very much. well, i wasn't earlier because when I put my mp3 player in my bag i didn't set the hold button, so i was faced with a flat battery and no music for my journey back today. swines.
current musical tip: ringleader of the tormentors (still). and beethoven's ninth. i'm reading clockwork orange at the minute and this is mentioned a lot. I'll have a viddy through my discs and slooshy to it later.

t-shirt fold'em

2006-04-26T21:39:00.000+01:00

crikey, this brings out the domestic godess in me

currently listening to: a billy bragg podcast (from his official site)

current musical tip: mansun. yes they split a few years ago but six is a classic album and i've just got around to listening to kleptomania, which is demos for their unreleased 4th album, b-sides and other rarities. take it easy, chicken. really, check out six, its ace, but only listen to it all at once otherwise it doesn't make sense. attack of the grey lantern is also a great album, full of their more famous tunes like wide open space, tax loss, she makes my nose bleed and stripper vicar.

in the future

2006-04-24T21:51:00.000+01:00

22 days. i knew that would happen.

sorry. how are you all? yes, you, the 0.05 people who are reading this. how self indulgent am i?

anyways, 22 days, lots must of happened. what has happened?

champions! yes, at the first time of asking, FC United have won the NWCFL Div 2 title. What a ride it was. If you don't know who FC are, then I've obviously not spoken to you for a year - click that link to find out. It was belting. We picked up the trophy on Saturday, in front of a record crowd of 6,028. Solid singing and celebrating (and drinking) all day, ending up with an open top bus tour round the corner to the pub (half a mile?) then celebrating with the team.

for example - my mate sam, fc manager Karl Marginson, me and my dad. and a flag.

Got a fine summer ahead - I'm off to see FC United play in Leipzig against, er, Lokomotiv Leipzig on 12 May. Should be a fine weekend. Some mid-season friendlies have been announced too - notably the long awaited home tie against AFC Wimbledon and derbies against Alty and Bury. Come on reds!
Morrissey I got to see the man himself at Salford Lowry last Tuesday. It was excellent. I now some readers may disagree that such a song was even tackled, but the rendition of How Soon Is Now was particularly good for me (having heard feeble attempts by the smiths which couldn't reproduce it properly). He is a legend - and the show at the Apollo next week will be even better.

Speaking of music, well excitied - got Billy Bragg gig on Friday. I may post about it then. I may not.
i got a drum machine. an electronic thing with 7 pads and 2 pedals and lots of loud drum sounds. i like it, i don't think the neighbours do. they have eBay to thank. i am getting there, slowly. this is it:

i am also getting a multi-track recorder. again, sorry neighbours.

I bought a five-disc box set of the exorcist, comprising of The Exorcist (which I already have), Exorcist II: The Heretic (awful, absolutely awful), Exorcsit III: Legion (awful, ok, but mainly awful) and two prequels, Dominion (shockingly bad. starts off ok but gets far worse. it is set in Kenya, but apparently the devil has an American accent, but then I guess we all knew that) and Exorcist the Beginning. I've not seen this yet, but I don't hold much hope.

I think I'm going to hell. Not because I've viewed such occult propaganda, but because i was stupid enought to buy it (when I already owned the excellent original). To think when I first watched the original, I couldn't sleep for two nights (embarassingly, yes, this is true). Now I lay awake berating the thirteen fucking pounds ninetey nine fucking pence i squandered on the rest of them. www.imdb.com if you are interested.

aside from that, it's been the usual. guitar, beer, music. speaking of music, i was listening to a libertines bootleg from their manchester gig a few years back, when pete doherty was playing. i cringe every time i heard the worthless cnuts name now (oh by the way, hi mum, hi dad). there's a bit on the bootleg between the first few songs when the crowd chanted "pete! pete! pete!" - since he was then 'back' in the band following prison and being booted out for his habits. (if i'm feeling a bit bigheaded i may claim it was me and my mate ant that started that chant, but i'm sure that can't be true). it felt good to have him back then, he was such a big part of the libertines, his songs were good, his singing and lyrics original and his live shows enthusiastic to say the least. and then he turned into a tosser. sorry pete, i still love your early stuff, and some babyshambles stuff, but you're a shadow of your former self. your tabloid coverage, albeit not something you orchestrate, though it's not far off that, is cringeworthy. your attempts to be the new sid vicious are sad. he had no talent, you do. now, i don't like to see anyone in a bad way, and i'd like to see PD get on the rails, but in the meantime its a crying shame. i saw babyshambles a few months back and was distinctly unimpressed. i've still got the libertines, but it looks like you haven't, pete.

saying that, i'm well excited about dirty pretty things new album. carl barat sounds awesome. excited for the raconteurs album too, obviously.

that is all. goodbye for another month.

currently listening to: well, even after that rant above - up the bracket by the libertines. one of the best albums of the last five years. (would i also be a tw.t if i say that its the original, before they pressed it with the what a waster EP tacked onto the end? thank yew). It's ace - from vertigo all the way through to i get along; a fine album. also trying to re-listen to all my billy bragg albums in advance of this week. Such a sad bstard.

current musical tip: Billy Bragg vol 1 boxset, what else! It's great value for money - £30 gets you four albums, 3 bonus CDs and 2 DVDs. Or you could just by Life's A Riot with Spy vs Spy, which has Milkman of Human Kindness and New England on it.

I was going to put some mp3s up but to be honest I couldn't be bothered with the wait of uploading them.

Instead download limewire and find them yourself if you're interested. I may post them here one day.

Dinosaur Jr - Start chopping (i gather they're touring the UK soon)
Franz Ferdinand - Misshapes (yes! an acoustic pulp cover!)
Morrissey - In The Future When All's Well (my 2nd favourite song on the new album)

Oh and feel free to leave some comments.

they even have that electrickery

2006-04-02T14:49:00.000+01:00

hello as some of you know, i said i wouldn't actually post anything on this blog.

however, i'm halfway through a six hour wait at plymouth airport - yes, it really does exist - and i've read all i want to of the viz, private eye and guitar monthly mags i bought earlier and just seen the free internet terminal in the corner of the departure lounge; here i am.

i doubt i'll say much ever on this wretched thing. i may just post links and such like.

for example, http://www.postsecret.com is a good read if you're not a cynic or heartless andhttp://www.nme.com/news is also good if you're prepared to ignore the obsession with the arctic monkeys and the rag's recent resemblence to smash hits.

as for why i'm in plymouth, well, that's 'cos i was at a wedding in tavistock yesterday and very good it was too. congratulations to chris and briony.

currently listening to: the fan above me, but also some band called saturday looks good to me
current music tip: saturday looks good to me - http://www.slgtm.com - bit like belle and sebastian plus tallulah gosh (hands up if you think i'm pretentious? moi?)
days to moz gig: about 16
hours until i'm next in work: too few